feat: added more details

TASKS.md

@@ -1,3 +1,8 @@
+- [ ] The file
 - [ ] Backups
 - [ ] Trusted Individuals
-- [ ] First Hour, Day, Week, Month, and Year
+- [x] First Hour, Day, Week, Month, and Year
+- [ ] Security
+- [ ] Review
+- [ ] Legal
+- [ ] Children

src/circumstances.md

@@ -0,0 +1,15 @@
+# Circumstances
+
+None of us know how we are going to leave the world. We may go in our sleep or it could happen suddenly. We might have days to say good-bye or we may only have the shortest second before the end. We also learned with frequent hospitalizations with COVID, the chance to say final words might be hours or even days before it actually happens.
+
+But, no matter how we leave the world, we leave others behind. Our survivors which may be our spouses, children, pet, or friends. There are others who have (or may want to) pick up the pieces to keep surviving themselves.
+
+Exit planning is not about you, it is about the survivors. It is making sure we cover the bases to make their [first days or weeks](./time.md) are supported because those moments are the worst moments of their lives.
+
+When we started coming up with exit planning, it came from experiences of getting a phone call about a parent dying in their sleep, or watching our parents prepare for their end. It is the what-if scenarios that rush by when someone is a few hours late coming home or that moment you pull your shaking your hands from the steering wheel of a near accident.
+
+This also means we need to plan knowing that the survivors may be utterly devastated. They have just lost you hours or even minutes ago. They have to be able to make choices because life won't let them stop and feel grief. There are things they need to know while talking to the doctors or the police. There are other things that need to be handled the day after or the week after.
+
+So we partition and categorize for them. We say "you need to pay attention to this and forget everything else until tomorrow." We give the priorities knowing both ours and their lives, how they handle stress, how they grieve.
+
+Dying is terrifying for everyone. It is the unknown end for us but also this gaping hole in their lives. How do they pick up their lives? How do they make sure the bills are paid, the house is taken care of, what if they are next?

src/compassion.md

@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+# Compassion
+
+Planning for the end is a compassion act. It is trying to ease our passing to the ones who survive. It is easy to just write down details, tasks, and items to do. You think of them as you do the plan or while you go about your life.
+
+> Oh, this is a new car. I better update where I'm putting the title.
+
+There is another component to this, it is probably a grieving person reading your plan and you aren't there. We need to acknowledge that in addition to the pieces, but at the same time, keep them relatively separate and not distracting.
+
+The first page in our [file](./file.md) is a just a little and nothing else.
+
+> Take a deep breath.
+>
+> You have this.
+
+It's going to be the first thing they see, the first thing they may always see when they go into the file. They need to know not to be scared or terrified. They need to know they can survive without you because they have to survive without you.
+
+The movie, *P.S. I Love You* (2007) is an inspiration for this. We can't always write letters to send our loved ones, but we can at least give them encouragements, words of affection, and remind them that we know what they are doing.
+
+Feel free to put a poem, a picture, or something that is important. Maybe a letter. It's that personal connection that is important. It is quite possible they have to put it aside, but those mementos might also be what keeps them going in the long nights that follow.
+
+Obviously, you don't know who is actually going to be reading the file or they have company. Also, this file is used when you can't help you might still be around, so this is not the time to confess to affairs, murders, or crimes. Don't ruin it for them.

src/documentation.md

@@ -4,27 +4,31 @@ For us, the biggest driver for these plans is compassion. We know we leave peopl
 
 The plan is to help them through this. This means not assuming they know your passwords or know where to find the bank accounts. If they can't find it, they may lose something important or not realizing there is something they need.
 
-This leads us to the first tenant:
+This leads us to the [first tenant](./tenants.md):
 
 > If it isn't written down, it doesn't exist.
 
 Documentation is critical to plan. The more that can be laid out, the better. However, you need to also realize they don't have your skills. Leaving documentation that says "use my SSH key to log into my website and then go to ~/docs/start.md" isn't going to help someone who doesn't know what SSH is.
 
-So a basic plan is just lists and directions. They can be dry but make them as detailed as reasonable. Pictures of screens might be helpful here, if you think it is complicated, but if that is too much, just go with pertinent information.
+So a basic plan is just lists and directions. They can be dry and they can be plain, but they need to be written down. Somewhere. On paper or on a computer, but it needs to be somewhere they can get it.
 
-This information also changes over time, so in our [file](./file.md), we use a blank sheet of 8x11" paper (or A5 like I prefer but can't use) for each one. This allows us to easily rewrite a page that has changed without rewriting an entire page. Or just cross out the old information and add new stuff to the page. We put the title in the upper left and a date in the upper right. The date helps with reviewing and the title makes it easier to page through a stack of pages to find the information that is needed.
+Start simple. Plain, just a few words. If you try to document all the things at once, it will quickly become overwhelming. So, to avoid that, just add a few details every time you [review](./review.md). Expand or clarify. Try to see it as if you don't know what you already know.
+
+This information will changes over time, so in our [file](./file.md), we use a blank sheet of 8x11" paper (or A5 like I prefer but can't use) for each one. This allows us to easily rewrite a page that has changed without rewriting an entire page. Or just cross out the old information and add new stuff to the page.
+
+From our experience, there are three useful pieces for the top of the page: title, [time category](./time.md), and date. The date is to let you know when you last updated the file. If its been a few years, you might need to look at it a bit more in detail. The title is just a hint of what the page contains. The category lets them focus only on what's important in that moment. Doing it this way also lets them page through the headers to find the section they need.
 
 ## Clarity
 
 You also have to be honest about your handwriting here. If people regularly tell you that they can't tell your lettering from the random scribbles of a two year old, you should probably type everything up.
 
-My cursive is horrible, but I have a decent block print. So my documentation is mostly hand-written, but I also make sure I can read it every time I [review](./review.md) the file.
+My cursive is horrible, but I have a decent block print. So my documentation is mostly hand-written, but I also make sure I can read it every time I review the file.
 
 ## Assumptions
 
 The important part is to not assume skill. Don't say "BitWarden" and a password. Let them know what it is:
 
-> To get to the list of all passwords and credit cards, go into BitWarden on my phone or at https://bitwarden.com/. The user name is XXX and the password is YYY. If you have my phone, you can use Ageis to get the verification key, otherwise this is a list of one-time passwords. If you use this, change the password immediately to something secure.
+> To get to the list of all passwords and credit cards, go into BitWarden on my phone or at https://bitwarden.com/. The user name is XXX and the password is YYY. If you have my phone, you can use Ageis to get the verification key, otherwise this is a list of one-time passwords. If you use this, change the password immediately to something secure; there is a "Generate" built into BitWarden that gives good passwords.
 
 Remember, you don't know who is going to be in the file. You don't know if they are [trusted](./trust.md) or not. It may not be your partner, but it might be your parents or one of your children. You can't assume knowledge, only that someone is trying to prevent your old life from falling apart. So, assume they know nothing.
 
@@ -36,14 +40,3 @@ The above example is probably a [first day](./time.md) item. Put it right at the
 
 - [Password Vaults](./passwords.md)
 - [Bank Accounts](./financial.md)
-
-The first should always be how to get into your [password safe](./passwords.md). This should have the user name and password and the one time recovery phases. Th
-
-- List all the bank accounts. This should include websites and logins to get them, the answers to the security questions, and any PIN numbers for the cards.
-
-- All the bank accounts, the website and logins to get them, and any PIN numbers.
-- A list of family members and their current relationship.
-- The user name and passwords other websites.
-- The VIN for cars.
-
-This information is dry and focuses less on the [compassionate](./compassion.md) side of things but gives critical information. Bills have to be paid after you're gone, the property taxes need to be paid, and someone has to get to the checking accounts.

src/financial.md

@@ -4,7 +4,7 @@ For a lot of us, we have access to financial accounts that our partners, childre
 
 ## Credit Cards
 
-As a [first day](./time.md) item, listing all credit card numbers, their PINs, security codes, and zip codes. You should be using a [password vault](./password.md), so this list should also include the name of the entry in the vault. If your vault can store the cards and you feel [safe](./security.md) putting it there, you could store it directly and then this part is just a list of entries and directions of how to get it into the vault.
+As a [first day](./time.md) item, listing all credit card numbers, their PINs, security codes, and zip codes. You should be using a [password vault](./passwords.md), so this list should also include the name of the entry in the vault. If your vault can store the cards and you feel [safe](./security.md) putting it there, you could store it directly and then this part is just a list of entries and directions of how to get it into the vault.
 
 This is a first day item because they may need a credit card to get a hotel in case of an emergency or to rent a vehicle in a hurry.
 

src/index.md

@@ -4,9 +4,11 @@ We plan for the birth of our children but rarely do we prepare ourself for death
 
 This isn't one long document because the idea is to keep things to reasonable chunks of information. Also, in hopes of being able to find specific topics when needed.
 
-The [introduction](./introduction.md) is a short essay on why planning for the end is important. It's a bit poetic, but seems like an easy way to start.
+The [introduction](./introduction.md) is a short essay on why planning for the end is important. It's a bit poetic, but seems like an easy way to explain why this was written and its purpose. We also have some [tenants](./tenants.md) which guide the process of creating an exit plan.
 
-The next section, [circumstances](./circumstances.md), is the beginning to talk about the situations that happens when exit planning in needed.
+The next section, [circumstances](./circumstances.md), is the beginning to talk about the situations that happens when exit planning is needed. Also, we talk about [time](./time.md) because that is critical to how we organize things.
+
+From there, we have two basic topics that need to be addressed: the [compassionate](./compassion.md) side of things and the [technical details](./documentation.md). These are both important, both to help ease the grief of our passing but also the concrete steps that need to be done next.
 
 ## Primary Links
 

src/introduction.md

@@ -8,7 +8,7 @@ What happens to those when you pass? Can the survivors take the reins and keep e
 
 Planning for how we leave the world is a compassion to those around us. We already know that they will be devastated and heart-broken, but how can we make sure their lives continue when we are no longer around? We document and we plan. We come up with something now, when we aren't in a hospital bed or flipping over in a car. We come up with something now so when it happens, we already know that we're prepared.
 
-This garden plot is written in an informal style. The basic conventions is "you" references the reader, maybe someone looking to prepare for the end while "we" is just us as a collective.
+This garden plot is written in an informal style but we use a few conventions. "You" refers to the one doing the exit planning, the one trying to prepare. "They" is your survivors. And finally, "we" is everyone including the people behind these words.
 
 > We are all in this together.
 

src/tenants.md

@@ -0,0 +1,11 @@
+# Tenants
+
+These are rough tenants that drive the philosophy of this document.
+
+## Tenant One: Document
+
+[If it isn't written down, it doesn't exist.](./documentation.md) When this plan is needed, they can't just run over and ask you to explain something. There is no hint. If you don't write it down, they have to figure it out, they need someone to help, or it gets lost.
+
+## Tenant Two: Compartmentalize
+
+Whoever is going to take over is not you. They don't have your knowledge and they probably haven't been thinking about it as long as you. At the same time, they will be probably dealing with a thousand other things that need to be done. That means we need to partition or compartmentalize our plan so they can confidently be able to push or set aside everything that isn't critical in that moment. That is why we organize based on [time](./time.md) and we don't just make dense list of details to remember.

src/time.md

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+# Time
+
+It won't take long for your [file](./file.md) to get overwhelming. Even if it isn't, there are times when you need to know about something and times when it can be pushed aside.
+
+To help with that, it is helpful to let them know what should be important at any given point. Now, there are a lot of ways of doing it, but what works for us is the following:
+
+- The First Hour
+- The First Day
+- The First Week
+- The First Month
+- The First Year
+
+Obviously, the critical things are handled and life will move on.
+
+## The First Hour
+
+The came up when one of our parents died their sleep. We got the phone call from the officers and one of the questions was: where should we send the body?
+
+Didn't have an answer for that.
+
+So, we asked for a little time and called around to get it. It was scary because we were already devastated and blind-sided by the news and we needed to be functional immediately.
+
+The first hour are questions that need to be asked when there is no time to find the [file](./file.md) or look up answers. They need to be answerable in the middle of an emergency room or standing in front of a destroy house. This also means, there needs to only be a limited number of them.
+
+From our experience, these are:
+
+- The location of our [plan](./file.md) including backup locations
+- What are our desires for our [funeral](./funeral.md)
+- Who can take the [children and pets](./children.md)
+- Who can be [trusted](./trust.md) to handle things
+- The location of the [will and powers of attorney](./legal.md)
+
+# The First Day
+
+After the first hour, which is usually handled in shock, the rest of the day is when things get overwhelming. There are probably doctors to talk to, family to inform, and everything else. Like the first hour, they need to be relatively short, critical pieces of information.
+
+However, this is also when someone has time to get your exit plan and start looking through it. Now, it may not be the actual first day, it might take a little while longer, but the key part is to answer questions "how to survive the night."
+
+# The First Week
+
+Unlike the first day, the ones that follow is where things start to go numb. It's where they are finally allowing themselves to realize that you're gone. This is when they are going to feel that aching hole the most and grief is going to be gnawing at their thoughts.
+
+It is also time that they may be sitting in the middle of a floor, trying to puzzle through your file. They are still going to be overwhelmed, so we need to be able to push non-serious things to side (for the first month and first year) and let them focus on "what do I do tomorrow."
+
+# The First Month
+
+Surviving the first week, things start to get a little easier. The immediacy should be lessening which means thoughts start to move into "how do I survive the year?" or "what do I do next?" This is when things like paying bills starts to come into play. There will be phone calls to start shutting down accounts, transferring bills, and basically gathering up the pieces.
+
+One will hope, this is also the point where there is less of a panic. But we still recommend that things that can wait are pushed into the final category, the first year.
+
+A good example is of a first month could be:
+
+- Where are bills paid and roughly how much
+- Life insurance information to get policies
+- Retirement funds in case loans need to be made
+- Human resources to contact for final checks
+
+# The First Year
+
+The final category is the first year. This is everything else including the annual bills like property taxes or car insurance payments. Hopefully, at this point, they have managed to get on their feet and are able to move on.
+
+This category ends up being a lot of hints and suggestions.