fix: editing chapters

chapters/chapter-05.md

@@ -6,13 +6,15 @@ access: private
 
 > The tradition of the bride price has not caught on among most of the more egalitarian of countries. --- Richol dea Lamaster, *The Tarsan Influence*
 
-Karin moved stiffly as she came around the corner toward Lilard's. Her leather armor creaked with each step. She had freshly repaired and oiled it, preparing for a battle. She had no doubt that Tristoh was expecting her to come back, she was predictable.
+Karin moved stiffly as she came around the corner toward Lilard's. Her leather armor creaked with each step. She had freshly repaired and oiled it, preparing for a battle. She had no doubt that Tristoh was expecting her to come back. Her ex-husband always said she was predictable.
 
 The usual crowds around the restaurant were gone. There was no one swaying in time to music. No one reading books while enjoying Lilian's voice. Tristoh's corruption had already taken root and it was obvious that the restaurant's fate was on a knife's edge.
 
-Karin slowed to a stop near the door.
+With a second look, Karin realized she was wrong. The old lady who had pointed out the empty table to Karin remained on her bench. She knitted quietly, her head bowed with concentration.
 
-"Looking for Lil?" asked the old woman who had pointed out the empty table on the first day. She was knitting quietly to herself. Her eyes were narrow as she glared at the glass window. She worked her lower lip as she glanced at Karin and back.
+Karin slowed to a stop near her.
+
+"Looking for Lil?" asked the old woman.Her eyes were narrow as she glared at the glass window. She worked her lower lip as she glanced at Karin and back.
 
 Head already throbbing from her hangover, Karin took a moment to process the unexpected question. She nodded. "Yes."
 
@@ -20,39 +22,45 @@ Head already throbbing from her hangover, Karin took a moment to process the une
 
 Karin turned to face the woman.
 
-The old woman bent over to dig into her kitting back. She held up an impressive-looking knife in a sheath. There was a name on the side, "Sindil". Flipping it over, she held it hilt-first to Karin. "Need a weapon?" Sindil asked cheerfully.
+The old woman bent over to dig into her kitting back. She held up an impressive-looking knife in a sheath. There was a name carved into the side of the sheath, "Sindil Lilard". Flipping it over, she held it hilt-first to Karin. "Need a weapon?" she asked cheerfully.
 
-"W-What?" Karin couldn't help but smile.
+"W-What?" Karin couldn't help but smile. She glanced down, looking for another weapon and noticed the same name on the side of the bag of yarn.
 
-"You obviously are going in with a plan."
+"You obviously are going in with a plan," asked Sindil.
 
 Karin shrugged. "Well, more of a vague idea. I was just going in to... make sure she knew she had an option."
 
-"Well, after what Jon did, it isn't going to be this place. This place had been in the family for five generations, it won't be around for the sixth." The older woman held up the knife again with a silent question.
+"That's good. The girl needs to know her options. Even if it takes a woman to have the balls to speak up."
 
-Karin shook her head. A weapon would be nice, but that would make everything worse if she got caught.
+Karin smirked.
 
-Tossing the knife back into her kitting back, Sindil returned to her knitting. "Three of his men are at tables one, seven, and fifteen."
+"After what Jon did, it isn't our place anymore. All the customers have already left, the ones left are going through the motions. It's a shame," she said shaking her head. "Lilard's has been in our family for five generations. Thanks to Jon, there won't be a sixth." The older woman held up the knife again with a silent question.
+
+Karin shook her head. A weapon would be nice, but that would make everything worse if she got caught. The city guard never responded well to armed hunters.
+
+Tossing the knife back into her kitting back, Sindil returned to her knitting. "Three of his men are at tables one, seven, and fifteen. Two on the right when you come in, the other is by the window behind you."
 
 Suddenly things seemed brighter. "Thank you," Karin said. "Who are you?"
 
 The old woman smiled sweetly. "Just an old widower who is severely disappointed in her greedy son. So try not to kill him?"
 
-Karin nodded. She turned, took a deep breath, and entered the restaurant.
+"I'll do that." Karin turned, took a deep breath, and started for the restaurant. She stopped. "Are you a hunter?" she asked.
+
+Sindil shrugged. "The men who fell for me were always mean drunks. Needed a little encouragement to send them on their way." She hefted her knife before jamming it back into her kitting bag.
+
+Amused, Karin shook her head and headed into the bakery.
 
 Jon, Lilian's father, looked up from where he was serving food. "You aren't wanted in here."
 
-Karin glanced around, spotting Tristoh's three men. They were all grunts and armed with short swords and leather armor. They also were turning toward her, their hands dropping to their weapons.
+Karin glanced around, spotting Tristoh's three men sitting at different tables. They were all grunts and armed with short swords and leather armor. They also were turning toward her, their hands dropping to their weapons.
 
-She looked at the counter leading into the back room and then to him. "I just want to talk to Lil."
+She looked at the counter leading into the back room and then to him. "I just want to talk to Lilian."
 
-The few real customers shifted uncomfortably in their seat.
+Jon stepped toward the center of the room and held the metal tray with one hand at his side. "Get the hell out of my place. You aren't welcomed here," he announced.
-
-Jon stepped toward the center of the room and held the metal tray with one hand at his side. "Leave. You aren't welcomed here," he announced.
 
 Karin shook her head. On one of the tables nearest to the door, she spotted a metal pitcher. She reached over and grabbed it. Her energies flowed through her hand as she focused on the rim to sharpen it while she spoke. "I'm going to talk to her."
 
-"She's been paid for."
+"She's on her way out. You don't need to talk to her."
 
 "Your daughter is not something to sell. Tristoh is going to hurt her and you know it."
 
@@ -62,15 +70,17 @@ Jon's jaw tightened. "At least the restaurant will survive. You don't understand
 
 One of Tristoh's men lurched out of his seat.
 
-She backhanded him with the pitcher, slamming the side of the heavy metal into the side of his face. It crunched and collapsed but the impact threw him into a table.
+She backhanded him with the pitcher, slamming the side of the heavy metal into the side of his face. It collapsed from the impact but she followed with a left hook that connected.
 
-He fell backwards, his foot lashing out and catching her elbow before she could bring down the sharpened rim into his thigh. The edge sliced off a corner of the table.
+He fell backwards, his foot lashing out and catching her elbow before she could bring down the sharpened rim into his thigh.
 
-Before the hunk of wood hit the ground, Karin was attacked from the other side. The warrior swung his sword down, the blade whistling through air.
+The pitcher missed and caught the edge of the table. Magically sharpened metal sliced off the corner.
 
-She jerked back, slipping on the water and ice. Desperate, she funneled her energies into the crumbled edge. The metal screeched as it was flattened and sharpened. Heat radiated through the metal, burning her fingers. She threw all her weight into blocking the blow.
+Before the hunk of wood hit the ground, Karin was attacked from the other side. The second warrior swung his sword down, the blade whistling through air.
 
-The crumbled metal slammed into the blade. The edges, each one sharpened to narrower to a supernatural edge, sliced into the steel weapon and tore out a large hunk.
+She jerked back, slipping on the water and ice. Desperate, she funneled her energies into the crumbled edge. The metal screeched as it was flattened and sharpened again. Heat radiated through the metal, burning her fingers. She threw all her weight into blocking the blow.
+
+The crumbled metal slammed into the blade. The edges, each one sharpened to narrower to a supernatural edge, sliced into the steel weapon and tore out a large hunk of the forged metal.
 
 The remaining edge smashed against her hand and the tip snapped off.
 
@@ -80,7 +90,7 @@ His eyes almost popped out of his head. A low gurgle escaped his lips.
 
 She released the ruined pitcher to uppercut him. Her knuckles slammed into the bottom of his chin, throwing him back.
 
-Staggering to her feet, she stepped out of the puddle. She should have known better than make the fight worse.
+Staggering to her feet, she stepped out of the puddle. She should have known better than make the fight worse by spilling water across the floor. Roal could never know.
 
 Jon gulped as he inched back.
 
@@ -106,7 +116,7 @@ All the speeches and things Karin was going to say slipped out of her mind at th
 
 "I-I do. I'll lose the restaurant if---"
 
-Karin interrupted her. "You've already lost it. If you stay with Tristoh, he's going to take you to Tarsan and you may never return here. He is a terrible person."
+Karin interrupted her. "You've already lost it. If you stay with Tristoh, he's going to take you to Tarsan and you may never return here. I know him, there is nothing good about him."
 
 Tears sparkled in Lilian's eyes. "W-Where would I go?"
 
@@ -114,10 +124,12 @@ Karin inhaled and shook her head. She hadn't really planned this far. "I don't k
 
 "What about you?"
 
-Karin stared at Lilian for a long moment. Then she lurched forward to kiss her. The touch of her soft lips to Karin's was everything she hoped for.
+Karin stared at Lilian for a long moment. Then she lurched forward to kiss her. The touch of her soft lips to Karin's was everything Karin had fantasized about. She let out a moan and inched closer to slid her arms around Lilian's waist.
 
 Lilian gasped, her body still trembling. Her hands lowered to catch Karin's hip. She didn't pull or tug, but held herself still.
 
+There was no passion, not even a hint.
+
 Karin broke the kiss with a soft sigh. "Not a peach."
 
 Lilian shook her head. "I'm sorry."
@@ -132,17 +144,17 @@ Lilian smiled broadly. "I... I always dreamed of singing at the Harmony Opera. S
 
 "Done." Karin picked up the now sharpened trays. "Come on, lets get you on the road."
 
-Lilian looked nervous and pale. She looked around the stone hearths and ovens.
+Lilian looked nervous and pale. She looked around the stone hearths and ovens. "Just leave?"
 
 Someone started to crawl over the counter.
 
-Karin threw two trays at the wooden beam over the counter. The metal rim easily cut through the wood.
+Karin threw two trays at the wooden beam over the counter. The metal rim easily cut through the wood but it held. She threw two more before the beam collapsed.
 
-The warrior had only a chance to look up in fear before the beam crushed him against the counter.
+The warrior had only a chance to look up in fear before the wood crushed him against the counter.
 
 Karin grabbed another two trays and kicked open the door. The sharpened edges shone in the air.
 
-It bounced off someone standing behind it.
+The door bounced off someone standing behind it and swung back.
 
 She kicked it again as she entered the restaurant side of the building. To her relief, the man with his chest impaled by a tray was still alive but sitting down. The one that she punched in the balls wasn't visible, so she swung the tray hard and slammed it through the door.
 
@@ -162,7 +174,7 @@ He held up his hands and dropped his sword. "He doesn't pay me that much."
 
 Karin followed after him.
 
-Outside the street was empty except for Sindil, who  still knitted on her bench, and the retreating warrior.
+Outside the street was empty except for Sindil, who still knitted on her bench, and the retreating warrior. The old woman had a smirk on her lips as her needles clicked together.
 
 Adrenaline surging through her veins, Karin stepped away from the door and prepared for another attack.
 
@@ -172,29 +184,31 @@ Her grandmother put down her knitting and hugged her tightly. "Go, my love. Righ
 
 "I'll write. I promise."
 
-"You better. Now go." Sindil stood up and gave Karin a hard look.
+"You better. Now go." Sindil stood up and gave Karin a hard look. For all her words, there was a threat from the spry old woman.
 
-Karin gulped and nodded.
+Karin smiled grimly and nodded. "Yes, Mother," she said in a deferential tone. Using "Mother" was just one way of saying that.
 
 Then the grandmother gestured with one gnarled finger at the window. "Run. I need to have a long talk with your dad."
 
 Lilian wiped the tears from her eyes and then headed for Karin. She held out her hand.
 
-Karin took the soft palm and held her firmly. Together, they hurried in the opposite direction of the fleeing warrior. She didn't know where to go or how she was going to get Lilian there, but she had hope that something would turn up.
+Karin took the soft palm then took it firmly. Together, they hurried in the opposite direction of the fleeing warrior. She didn't know where to go or how she was going to get Lilian there, but she had hope that something would turn up.
 
-Three streets and two alleys of frantic running later, she came around a corner to find Raol sitting on a wagon with a horse already harnessed into place.
+Three streets and two alleys of frantic running later, she came around a corner to find Roal sitting on a wagon with a horse already harnessed into place.
 
-Karin gasped in relief. "Oh, thank the Couple. Raol!"
+Karin gasped in relief. "Oh, thank the Couple. Roal!"
 
 He didn't seem surprised to see her; his talent was to show up when he was needed. Slipping off the bench, he came around to open the back of the wagon and held out his hand to Lilian. "Just her or both of you running away?"
 
-No question of what had happened. No hesitation. Raol showed up knowing that Karin needed it and answers would be given later.
+No question of what had happened. No hesitation. No doubt. Roal showed up knowing that Karin needed it and answers would be given later.
 
 Karin worried her lip. "Just her. If I run, the Rat Hunters will pay the price."
 
 Lilian gasped. "You're staying? No, you can't do that. Come with me."
 
-Karin looked at the beautiful woman. It was heartbreaking but she knew Lilian would never be a peach. Going with would just be torture for both of them. "No, but draw ten thousands crowns from my pay and give it to her. And find her someone to take care of her in Moon Waters."
+Karin looked at the beautiful woman. It was heartbreaking but she knew Lilian would never be her peach. Without that passion, going along would just be torture for both of them.
+
+Groaning, she turned to Roal. "Draw ten thousands crowns from my pay and give it to her. That should be enough to pay for room and board for a year. And find her someone to take care of her in Moon Waters. Someone trustworthy that won't take advantage of her."
 
 Roal grunted and nodded. He helped Lilian get into the wagon and then underneath a heavy canvas tarp. He crawled over to the bench and sat down. "I'll come back for you."
 

chapters/chapter-06.md

@@ -10,7 +10,7 @@ Karin groaned and leaned against the rough stone bricks. The cold seeped into th
 
 With a sigh of relief, she sat back into her seat. Other parts of her hurt but it was nothing compared to being kicked in the chest by that howling horse with claws or when the leeches were burrowing in her gut.
 
-The men Tristoh had bribed to beat her weren't seriously injuring her. That meant that he probably dropped crowns to ensure the judge would convict her with something serious. She suspected she would be looking at a murder or a treason charge. Fortunately, San Graif wasn't large enough for dedicated justice so she had a few more days to stew.
+The men Tristoh had bribed to beat her weren't seriously injuring her. That meant that he probably dropped crowns to ensure the judge would convict her with something serious. She suspected she would be looking at a murder or a treason charge. Fortunately, San Graif wasn't large enough for dedicated justice so she had a few more days of beatings.
 
 She thought about Lilian's voice and the memories that washed over her every time she sang a song. Leaning back against the wall, she smiled to herself. Her lips worked silently as she sang one of the song that Lilian had taught her to love and just let the pain ease away.
 
@@ -22,9 +22,9 @@ Curious, she sat up.
 
 The door swung open and a guard came in. It was one of the ones that Tristoh had hired to beat her. She started to steel herself for another round of abuse but then she noticed he was covered in blood with thick bandages over one eye and a makeshift sling holding his arm. "She's in here, Mother," the guard said sullenly.
 
-Sindil followed after him, her knitting bag hoisted over her shoulder and a pair of needles in her hand. The yarn was stained and torn. The knife hung out of one of a scorched opening. She shuffled forward as she peered around until she spotted Karin and then came over.
+Sindil followed after him, her knitting bag hoisted over her shoulder and a pair of needles in her hand. The yarn was stained and torn. The knife hung out of a scorched opening. She shuffled forward as she peered around until she spotted Karin and then came over.
 
-Behind both of them, Raol came in with a grin on his face and his hands in his pockets. He had blood splattered across his chest. Karin noticed that he was carrying his ax in his hand.
+Behind both of them, Roal came in with a grin on his face and his hands in his pockets. He had blood splattered across his chest. Karin noticed that he was carrying his ax in his hand and it looked recently used.
 
 Karin stood up, winching a little from the discomfort.
 
@@ -32,6 +32,8 @@ Sindil peered at Karin for a moment. Then she turned to the guard. "Well, what a
 
 The guard looked nervously at Karin as he unlocked the door.
 
+Karin stared directly at him. She didn't think telling Sindil that he had been beating Karin for days would help anyone at the moment. Maybe later.
+
 Roal came up to pull it open and handed Karin her sword. "Tristoh left the city a surprise gift when he stormed away. A herd of bulls with thick armored plates and able to set fires with their feet. I need my sharpener. You up to it?"
 
 Karin took a deep breath and took the weapon. Her thoughts slid away from Lilian with a rush as she started preparing for a fight. Energy danced along the blade as she sharpened it with a thought.
@@ -44,7 +46,7 @@ The old woman caught her arm to walk with her. She was spry for her age but Kari
 
 Karin smiled at the image and rested her palm over the old woman's. "Thank you."
 
-"I'm sorry it took so long to get you free. Jon should have never pressed charges like that."
+"I'm sorry it took so long to get you free. Jon was being stubborn and the sheriff is still pissed at me for refusing to serve his wife when she was the tax collector. A lot of bad blood for this old lady. At least her granddaughter is safe."
 
 "She was worth it."
 
@@ -52,4 +54,8 @@ Karin smiled at the image and rested her palm over the old woman's. "Thank you."
 
 Karin made it two steps before the words registered. She inhaled sharply and looked over.
 
-The old woman grinned and squeezed Karin's arm. "Maybe after you save our city, I could make you one?"
+The old woman grinned and squeezed Karin's arm. "Maybe after you save our city, I could make you one? The recipe is on the old side, but I'd bet you'd like a slice."
+
+Karin stared in shock.
+
+The old woman hefted her bloody knitting needles, gave a wink, and headed after Roal.

language.json

@@ -7,6 +7,7 @@
 		"Maril's",
 		"Ralisman",
 		"Roal",
+		"Sindil",
 		"Tarsan",
 		"Tristoh",
 		"Tristoh's"