fix: edited one through three

chapters/chapter-01.md

@@ -2,6 +2,8 @@
 title: Measured
 ---
 
+> The debutante's best chance to fulfill her role as a married woman comes from the debutante balls where she is presented before suitors of all ages from eighteen to eighty. --- Polistar da Halin, *The Dance of Grace*
+
 Galadin sat on the uncomfortable seat of the tailor's front room and stared into the display area for the front windows. Four mannequins with formal black suits filled the area but his interest remained fixed on the fifth, an exaggerated female shape made of wood and reeds. The fabric of her dress rustled with the wind breezing through the open door and he loved how the sleeves moved like ocean waves.
 
 He wondered what it would feel like if he wore it. A faint smile crossed his lips as he tried to imagine the layers of light material against his skin. Would it be heavy or light? He wanted to reach out and touch it.

chapters/chapter-02.md

@@ -2,21 +2,25 @@
 title: Dance Lessons
 ---
 
-Dame Dorin's School of Dance was a small studio on the corner of Apple and Oak. It used to have a reputation of a great dance school but time and scandle had whittled away at its reputation until it was just another old building with too much paint and creaking floor. The lessons were still good and the price enough for Galadin's parents, so for the last month, he had been going once a week to learn the proper footing and hands of the dances at the presentation balls.
+> At the presentation, every step is planned. The choices of dance speak of the politics of the day. The order of the suitors is reflected in the ebb and flow of power. --- Renard Robins-Grace, *Musings of a Failed Society*
+
+Dame Dorin's School of Dance was a small studio on the corner of Apple and Oak. It used to have a reputation of being a great school but time and scandal had whittled away at its reputation until it was nothing more than an old building with too much paint and creaking floors. Dorin's lessons were still cherished and her price low enough for those seeking to enter High Society.
+
+Galadin had been going for a month now. Dame Dorin's teaching style was brusque but effective. She had precise ideas of where the hands, feet, and hips all went to ensure a courtly dance in synchrony with everyone else on the floor. Much of the presentation came in viewing the dance from above, where everyone couldn't see their neighboring couple's effort.
 
 His mother stopped at the entrance. She looked up at a nearby clock tower and hissed between her teeth. "I'm late. Go inside and behave."
 
 "Yes, mother."
 
-She gave him a perfunctionary kiss on his cheek before crossing the street.
+She gave him a perfunctory kiss on his cheek before crossing the street.
 
-Galadin watched her until a trio of mechanical vechicles roared down the street, obscuring everything in a cloud of sharp-tasting steam. He turned and headed up the stairs.
+Galadin watched her until a trio of mechanical vehicles roared pass, obscuring everything in a cloud of sharp-tasting steam. He turned and headed up the stairs.
 
 "Gal! Wait for me!"
 
-HHe turned as Kalir, one of his friends, bounded up the stairs. He wore a leather jacket with an embossed symbol of the Tarsan Navy. Unlike Galadin, Kalir had a letter of commission as a junior officer. As soon as the summer ended, he would be heading to the naval base a few leagues along the coast for at least ten years of service. Like all officiers, he was expected to bbe married before he gained more than a few ranks. The presenstaion balls wwere the perfect time to find a wife.
+He turned as Kalir, one of his new friends, bounded up the stairs. He wore a leather jacket with an embossed symbol of the Tarsan Navy. Unlike Galadin, Kalir had a letter of commission as a junior officer. As soon as the summer ended, he would be heading to the naval base a few leagues along the coast. Like all officers, he was expected to be married before he gained more than a few ranks. The presentation balls were the perfect time to find a wife for an upcoming star.
 
-"How are you doing? Usually you beat me here."
+"How are you doing? Usually you beat me here," asked Galadin.
 
 "Well, I want to claim Missun's hand for practice."
 
@@ -24,23 +28,23 @@ Galadin shrugged. "You can dance with whoever you want."
 
 "But she's the prettiest."
 
-He couldn't explain that he had no interest in either of the girls that took classes at the same time. They were nice and friendly, but everyone was uncomfortable with their futures to be set at the balls, not in a dance hall.
+He couldn't explain that he had no interest in either of the girls that took classes with them. They were nice and friendly, but he didn't find his eyes drifting toward them when they weren't looking. Nor did he want to talk about their bodies as often as Kalir did.
 
 "You can have Talin," Kalir said patted Galadin's shoulder. "She's pretty enough."
 
-Kalir ran his hand through his thick hair and smiled. Galadin could see why both Missun and Talin acted more like a lady around him.
+Kalir ran his hand through his thick hair and smiled. Galadin could see why both Missun and Talin teased him.
 
-A surge of guilt rose inside Galadin and he looked away. He knew he was supposed to be flirting with the girls. He spent his time watching Talin instead and he knew that wasn't right. When his cheeks began to grow flushed, he cleared his throat to distract himself. "Usually you beat me here" before he realized he had already said that.
+A surge of guilt rose inside Galadin and he looked away. He knew he was supposed to be flirting with the girls. He spent his time watching Talin instead despite knowing that it wasn't right. When his cheeks began to grow flushed, he cleared his throat to distract himself. "Usually you beat me here" before he realized he had already said that.
 
 "I got distracted and almost forgot to show up." Kalir glanced over his shoulder as a second man started up the stairs.
 
-The newcomer was just over six feet tall, despite hunching over and having his hands buried into a pair of plain functional trousers. He had a deep tan with just a hint of red, someone who had spent much of their days out in the open. He wasn't quite slender nor was he fat, just thick with the flex of muscles with every step he took to join them. He also wore a Navy jacket, though this one also had a First Lieutenant insigna.
+The newcomer was just over six feet tall. He had a hunch to his movements, magnified by his hands buried deep inside a pair of plain, functional trousers. His deep tan possessed a hint of red; he appeared to be someone who had spent much of their days out in the open. He wasn't quite slender nor was he fat, just thick with the flex of muscles with every step he took to join them. He also wore a Navy jacket, though this one also had a First Lieutenant insignia.
 
 Kalir twisted his face and gestured to the door. "Come on, we're late."
 
 The other man chuckled and then gestured for Galadin to go ahead through the narrow door.
 
-Galadin stared at him for a moment, a strange fluttering growing in his stomach. "Um, I'm Galadin."
+Galadin stared at him for a moment, a strange fluttering growing in his stomach. The second man had much of Kalir's handsome features but they were refined with age and a sense of grace. "Um, I'm Galadin."
 
 "Benard, Kalir's older brother."
 
@@ -50,31 +54,35 @@ Benard grinned. "I'm afraid my younger brother doesn't care for me. Don't take i
 
 "Oh," Galadin said before he headed up the stairs. "Why?"
 
-"Probably the same reason most of my famly hates me: I like men instead of women."
+"Probably the same reason most of my family hates me: I prefer the company of men in my bed instead of women."
 
-Galadin froze, his world spinning with his fingers only inches from the closing door. Like men? That was an option? Did he really mean like? As in attraction? Or just friendship like his two uncles?
+Galadin froze when he heard words that reflected his own thoughts only moments ago. He didn't know if he was interested in men sexually, but he knew that he found them far more attractive and alluring than women. Was that the same thing? Or was it just a desire for friendship like his two uncles who live together?
 
-Benard reached around Galadin and pulled open the door. "Here, let me."
+"I-I...." Galadin stammered.
 
-Nervous, Galadin look at him. He didn't know what to do to calm his rapidly beating heart. He wanted to ask questions, starting with "why?"
+Benard reached around Galadin. His arm brushed against Galadin before he caught the hand and pulled it open."Here, let me."
+
+A waft of his cologne, a musky scene with a hint of cedar washed over Galadin. It smelled good. It also set off a rapid beating of his heart.
+
+Nervous, Galadin look at him with confusion. He wanted to ask questions, starting with "why?"
 
 The naval officer inclined his head and then smiled, his lips curling and drawing Galadin's attention. "Don't worry, it isn't contagious."
 
 "No... I... I didn't think... sorry."
 
-Benard gestured again. "Please, don't worry about it. Let's enjoy an afternoon of triping over our feet instead?"
+Benard gestured again. "Please, don't worry about it. Let's enjoy an afternoon of tripping over our feet instead?"
 
-"Okay," Galadin said in a distratcted voice. He felt hot and dizzy. His stomach fluttered as he dwelled over Benard's words. Like men?
+"Okay," Galadin said in a distracted voice. He felt hot and dizzy. His stomach fluttered as he mulled over Benard's words. Like men?
 
-Inside the studio, Dame Dorin paced back and forth. "Three? I can't work with three men. Where are the women?"
+Inside the studio, Dame Dorin paced back and forth. "Three, only three? I can't work with three men. Where are the women?"
 
 Kalir looked disappointed. He turned and peered out the window.
 
-Dorin rolled her eyes. "They aren't coming, Besire Kalir. All three of them had a case of... bad food and are too sick to learn how to dance. Damn the Couple, I can't reschedule this."
+Dorin grumbled for a moment. "They aren't coming, Besire Kalir. All three of them had a case of... bad food and are too sick to learn how to dance. Damn the Couple, I can't reschedule this. There are far too many lessons before the balls."
 
-Benard stepped up next to Galadin. His body heat washed over Galadin, sending little flutters from their closeness. "Then you be a partner."
+Benard stepped up next to Galadin. His body heat and scent washed over Galadin again, sending little flutters from their closeness. "Then you be one of the partners."
 
-She narrowed a glare at him. "I know of you."
+She narrowed a glare at him. "You should have remained on the sea."
 
 He shrugged and smiled. "I earned this, Dame. You know that."
 
@@ -82,26 +90,26 @@ She stared at him for a moment. Galadin could see her resolve cracking.
 
 "We can switch leads, its better than nothing. You and I trade places with the boys." He had a smirk that Galadin couldn't tear his eyes away from.
 
-"That is improper."
+"That is improper." She turned on him. "You might think it is fond idea, but I will not allow you to---"
 
-"Blame me then. That's how I got here, isn't it? By the way, how are your brothers? I heard they just got out of hosptice."
+Benard interrupted her with a grin. "Blame me then. That's how I got here, isn't it? By the way, how are your brothers? I heard they just got out of hospice."
 
-She took a deep breath and let it out, her body shaking with the effort to calm down. When she spoke, her voice was calmer. "You don't have to remind me that earned that commission, Besire."
+She took a deep breath and let it out, her body shaking with the effort to calm down. When she spoke, her voice was calmer. "You don't have to remind me how earned that commission, Besire."
 
 He inclined his head but said nothing.
 
 Galadin frowned as he looked back and forth.
 
-"Not more than a few minutes at a time, I don't want you giving them any foul ideas."
+"Not more than a few minutes at a time, I don't want you giving them any foul ideas." She pointed accusingly at him. "And no touching where you aren't supposed to."
 
-Kalir held up his hands. "I'm not dancing with my brother. I'm not the girl!"
+Kalir held up his hands. "I'm not dancing with... my brother. I'm not the girl!"
 
-She almost lost her temper. "Fine, you dance with me. You," she pointed at Benard, "start with Galadin and switch roles. I'll give direcitons to all three of you."
+She almost lost her temper. "Fine, you dance with me. You," she pointed at Benard, "start with Galadin and switch roles. I'll give directions to all three of you."
 
-Galadin's heart beat faster. He turned to his new partner. His throat felt dry and constricted.
+Galadin's heart beat faster. He turned to his new partner. His throat felt dry and constricted. He wanted to reach out and touch him, to feel the rough skin on his fingertips.
 
-Benard smiled warmly and gave a little bow. His smile was hard to look away from. He seemed more comfortable with himself than anyone Galadin had known, as if he was exactly what he wanted to be.
+Benard smiled warmly and gave a little bow. His smile was hard to look away from. He seemed more comfortable with himself than anyone Galadin had known, as if he had chosen his body and wore it like a well-tailored suit.
 
-Galadin felt a little jealousy. He didn't know why he felt wrong all the time.
+Galadin felt a little jealousy. He didn't feel the same about his body. It was wrong, it didn't fit. He couldn't say why, only that he was uncomfortable with the man in the mirror.
 
-"Now, the first dance we're going to do the Fox Square. Start with Galadin and Kalir in the lead. Lift your right hand up, palm up...."
+"Now, the first dance we're going to do the Fox Square," announced Dorin. "Start with Galadin and Kalir in the lead. Lift your right hand up, palm up...."

chapters/chapter-03.md

@@ -2,29 +2,31 @@
 title: Decision
 ---
 
+> Skilled mages are the cornerstone of a family's reputation. While they are arguable insane to talk to, they pull more than their weight for the greater good of society. --- Lanister da Dusen ho Gason
+
 Galadin had to concentrate on his dinner for the first time. His mind spun furiously with all the rules of how to hold his fork, where to put his hand, and even where he was allowed to look. There seemed to be exceptions to every rule.
 
-His mother had insisted on a formal dinner arrangement. Galadin could see how she held her utinsils with exagerrated care. He suspected hte last time she ate formally, it was before she married his father. More than once, he saw her reach for the wrong fork only to change her mind and pick up the correct one.
+His mother had insisted on a formal dinner arrangement at home. Galadin could see how she held her utensils with exaggerated care. He suspected the  last time she ate formally, it was before she married his father. More than once, he saw her reach for the wrong fork only to change her mind and pick up the correct one.
 
-On the other side of the table, his father worked his way through his meal efficiently and without grace. He used the same fork and knife, shoving the rest of them to the side as he stared down at the table in concentration. His other hand moved in gestured that mimicked his magical spells, it must have been a rough day at his job.
+On the other side of the table, his father worked his way through his meal efficiently and without grace. He used the same fork and knife, shoving the rest of them to the side as he stared down at the table in concentration. His other hand moved in gestured that mimicked the symbols he used for his job as a civil mage.
 
 "How were the lessons today?" asked his mom.
 
 "Good." He thought about Benard's hand against his own. He could remember how the firm grip guided him from one step to the other, commanding but not demanding. He smiled.
 
-"I heard the Tiffin girls were sick."
+"I heard the Tifin girls were sick."
 
 "They were. We had to use each other as partners."
 
-His mother's head snapped up. "I don't want you doing that."
+His mother's grip on her fork tightened. "Reeally?" she said in a wary tone.
 
 "Dame Dorin da Kasin watched over all three of us."
 
-His father stirred and leaned toward Galadin's mother. "I thoguht there were two boys in the class."
+His father stirred and leaned toward Galadin's mother. "I thought there were two boys in the class."
 
 His mother glared at him.
 
-"What? I was paying attention," his father said with a wry smile.
+"What? I was paying attention," his father said with a wry smile. His eyes followed a heartbeat later as he smiled wider.
 
 "There were." She turned back to Galadin. "Who was the third? The dame?"
 
@@ -36,23 +38,27 @@ His mother's face paled. "No," she said.
 
 "No, you don't do that. Storan, he can't do that."
 
-"Who? Take lessons with Benard? Why not? He's a Kasin hero." His father shrugged. "Wasn't he just granted a commision? Something about saving a fleet from some fire mages? He was granted First Lieutenant on the spot. They've been talking about that for days down at the dock."
+"Who? Take lessons with Benard? Why not? He's a Kasin hero." His father shrugged. "Wasn't he just granted a commission? Something about saving a fleet from some fire mages? Made First Lieutenant on the spot. They've been talking about that for days down at the dock."
 
 "That's besides the point! Your son cannot dance with that man!"
 
-Storan shrugged. His eyes glazed over and he began to trace imginary sigils in the air.
+Storan shrugged. His eyes glazed over and he began to trace imaginary sigils in the air.
 
-"Storan!"
+"Storan! Don't you dare drift away."
 
 His father ignored her.
 
-Maran folded her napkin into her lap. "Then I'm going to pull you from those lessons. You are good enough for lessons. We need to get you fitted for a proper top hat next week. Tomorrow, your suit should be done. We will deal with that."
+Maran folded her napkin into her lap. "Then I'm going to pull you from those lessons. You are good enough for the ball. As long as you don't stumble on your feet, you'll find a wife."
 
-Galadin fought back a wave of disappointement. Benard was the only thing he enjoyed about the day. Everything else reminded him that he was being forced into a role he didn't want. Why did he have to go to the dance? Why did he have to marry?
+She took a short breath. "Besides, we need to get you fitted for a proper top hat next week. Tomorrow, your suit should be done. We will deal with that."
 
-His mother pointedly look at her husband.
+Galadin fought back a wave of disappointment. Benard was the only thing he enjoyed about the day. Everything else reminded him that he was being forced into a role he didn't want. Why did he have to go to the dance in a suit? Why did he have to find a woman?
 
-Storan didn't look up from his thoughts.
+He wondered about Benard's words. Was that a possibility? To find a man instead? The thought warmed him.
+
+His mother pointedly look at her husband. "Well?"
+
+Storan didn't look up.
 
 "You are useless," she announced before leaving the table.
 
@@ -72,12 +78,14 @@ Galadin turned to see him no longer drawing. "Yes, father?"
 
 "You can say 'no,' you know."
 
-"What? Say 'no' to what?" He was confused about his father's words.
+"What? Say 'no' to what?" He was confused, but that described most of his father's conversations. Being a mage changed how he saw the world.
 
-"You're becoming a man. No matter what your mother says, you are the one who choses what type of man you'll become."
+"You're becoming a man. No matter what your mother says, you are the one who chooses what type you'll become."
 
 "I... I don't understand."
 
 His father smiled. "I know. Just remember it. Whatever you choose, no matter what path you take, I will support you. Even against the furies of the storm itself." He winked. "I'm talking about your mother, that is."
 
-That didn't help. Galadin thanked him and then headed to his room.
+Galadin stared at his father who returned to his thoughts. Nothing he said made any sense, yet at the same time, it felt comforting. He dismissed it as the musings of a mage who didn't quite see the world the same.
+
+With a muttered thanks, he returned to his room.

chapters/description.md

@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: Description
+---
+
+Galadin always wanted to go the glorious presentation balls, but not as a potential suitor but as one of the debutantes. However, society and his sex made it impossible: only young girls were allowed to be a debutante.
+
+That may change when Galadin finds the courage to finally tell his mother what he wants, a courage driven by a chance encounter with a most unexpected Naval officer.

language.json

@@ -2,6 +2,9 @@
 	"knownWords": [
 		"Benard",
 		"Benard's",
+		"Besire",
+		"Dorin",
+		"Dorin's",
 		"Galadin",
 		"Galadin's",
 		"Glorin",
@@ -12,10 +15,15 @@
 		"Kasins",
 		"Maran",
 		"Maran's",
+		"Missun",
+		"Missun's",
 		"Moonfire",
 		"Penelop",
 		"Rach",
+		"Storan",
+		"Talin",
 		"Tarsan",
+		"Tifin",
 		"besires",
 		"da",
 		"de"