From e473b615f79328d21433c0080facf5a9cfffac17 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: "D. Moonfire" Date: Tue, 24 Dec 2019 01:51:55 -0600 Subject: [PATCH] fix: tweaking one --- README.md | 2 +- chapters/chapter-01.md | 32 ++++++++++++++++++++------------ language.json | 3 ++- 3 files changed, 23 insertions(+), 14 deletions(-) diff --git a/README.md b/README.md index 22c0ec3..d7a7fcf 100644 --- a/README.md +++ b/README.md @@ -6,7 +6,7 @@ This is the repository for *Allegro* by D. Moonfire. Outline ------- -1. Young girl, very active. Likes to bounce around. Her father, who worked on violins, starts to play one while her mother dances with her. +1. [DONE] Young girl, very active. Likes to bounce around. Her father, who worked on violins, starts to play one while her mother dances with her. 2. Years later, she is learning how to play the violin when a friend of the family (to be bad guy) comes to say the factory has caught on fire. Father and mother rush to the blaze, she stays behind with her grandmother. diff --git a/chapters/chapter-01.md b/chapters/chapter-01.md index 0cc9166..43ee6eb 100644 --- a/chapters/chapter-01.md +++ b/chapters/chapter-01.md @@ -2,6 +2,8 @@ title: Always Moving --- +> For eight generations, the Sterlig Family crafted some of the most treasured string instruments throughout Kormar. --- *History of Traditional Music* + Linsan bounced on the couch. With a flip of her green skirt, she did a somersault along the cushions before flopping again opposite arm. The couch creaked from the impact but she didn't care. With a grin, she pushed herself over the edge until her head dangled over the blue and white patterned rub glow. In her mind's eye, she saw white snakes crawling around the blue waters and slowly reached out to catch one of them before it escape. @@ -20,13 +22,13 @@ She giggled. "No! I'm right here!" "You weren't crashing around. I wasn't sure." -She rolled her eyes and rolled up the arm of the couch and over the back until she was bent over it. One bare foot toyed with the edge of the couch cushion as she watched her father pull out one of his delicate carving tools and held it over the wood. +She rolled her eyes and rolled up the arm of the couch and over the back until she was bent over it. One bare foot toyed with the edge of the couch cushion as she watched her father pull out one of his delicate carving tools and held it over the wooden board on the table. Lifting her other foot, she waved it. "See? I'm not dead!" "Oh, good, I was worried there for a moment," he said with a smile. His eyes never left the wood as he carved out a little curl of red. His fingers flexed for a moment before he carved out another curl to match the other. Each one was smaller than the ridge of her fingernail. -He paused for a moment before he wiped the side of his cheek. Sawdust clung to his beard but quickly disappeared among the auburn and white streaks. +He paused for a moment before he wiped the side of his cheek. Sawdust clung to his beard but quickly disappeared among the auburn and gray hairs. "What are you working on, Daddy?" @@ -42,7 +44,7 @@ His smile grew broader. "Because she found someone wonderful." She grinned. "Why?" -"Because if I don't finish this, I'm going to have to eat you." +"Because if I don't finish this, I'm going to have to eat you instead." Rolling over, she shook her head. "No, you aren't going to eat me! Mommy would yell at you. And then you'll get spanked." @@ -54,9 +56,9 @@ Linsan spun around. "Mommy!" She launched herself off the couch, her bare feet hitting the rug before she remembered the imaginary snakes. With a shriek, she stumbled forward. "Snakes!" -Her mother dropped the cloth bags in her hand and caught her. +Her mother dropped the cloth bags in her hand and caught her. Groceries poured out across the floor. -Linsan pressed her cheek against her mother's. "There are snakes in the rug," she whispered. +Linsan pressed her cheek against her mother's. The scent of her mother's perfume surrounded her in a cloud, she must have picked up food on the way from her latest show. She turned and pointed to an apple in the middle of the rug. "There are snakes in the rug," she whispered dramatically. "Oh no, did Daddy get rid of them?" @@ -70,16 +72,22 @@ Linsan beamed. "I named his violin. It looked like a Palisis." There was a brief silence. -"That's a pretty good name, I like it." +"That's a pretty good name, I like it. Marin will love it." -Her mother nodded. Then she reached down to hug Linsan tightly. "Good job. But we still have to deal with the snakes?" +"Who is Marin?" -Her attention drawn back to the rug, she pointed at the blue patterns. "They are blue and poisonous and they bite you if you step on them." +"Marin was daddy's first wife. That's who the violin is for. She's getting married to mommy's best friend from when she was a little girl." -"But did you know, snakes can't hurt you if you're dancing?" Without waiting for a response, she took Linsan's hands and drew her around in a circle. "Now, imagine daddy is playing music and you are moving in time." +She kissed Linsan on the top of her head. "Now, if daddy is trapped by the snakes, that means we have to rescue him. How do we do that?" -Linsan beamed as she imagined a cheerful tune. She jumped and spun in time with it. Encouraged by her mother's laughter, she got more wild as she spun and twirled around. +Linsan bounced, her smile growing broader. Her auburn hair fluttered everywhere as she spun around a few times. "We dance! They can't bite us if we keep moving!" -There was the brief hum of a fiddle and then a cheery jig filled the room. Linsan peered over the couch to see that her father had abandoned his work and picked up Katsaril, an old fiddle Linsan had named when she was three. +Another kiss. "That's right! Snakes can't bite us if we're dancing." She stood up and took Linsan's hands to pull her into a lively jig to music that no one could hear. -Her mother pulled Linsan around, spinning her as Linsan happily bounced and danced the snakes away. +Before long, they were spinning around the living room. Linsan loved when her mother lifted her hand because that meant she got to twirl around rapidly. The sweeping arm movements told her she was along to spin away knowing her mother would pull her back. She loved each time she could kick off the ground and skim the couch with her toes before being pulled back into her mother's embrace. + +There was the brief hum of a fiddle and then a cherry tune filled the room. In the middle of a twirl, Linsan peered over the couch to see that her father had abandoned his work and picked up Katsaril, an old fiddle Linsan had named when she was three. + +With the music no longer imaginary and the snakes forgotten, Linsan danced happily in the living room with her parents. + +As far as she was concerned, that would never change. diff --git a/language.json b/language.json index 517994b..7022107 100644 --- a/language.json +++ b/language.json @@ -3,6 +3,7 @@ "Katsaril", "Linsan", "Linsan's", - "Palisis" + "Palisis", + "Sterlig" ] } \ No newline at end of file